TBP:  If you could have one gay man stereotype what would it be?

Suzanne:  Gay men always look better.  How is it that you can take a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and always look unbelievably great and I just look like a dyke with make-up and jeans and a t-shirt on trying to be put together? 

TBP:  What will I learn if you show me your Tweets on Twitter?

Suzanne:  My real personality.  My activism and my shallowness.  One minute I am like, “Fight for change.”  The next I am all “I want a burger.”  It’s me – “Fight for people” then “OMG I need a damn Peppermint Patty.” 


I want to rant about expensive dark chocolate.  It’s shit.  It smells horrible and no one will eat it.  I am a Hershey’s gal.  Eighty-five percent Cocoa?  F**k that.  I want a peanut butter cup.  Bring back milk chocolate.

TBP:  Bruce or Bon Jovi? 

Suzanne:  Neither.  I was not cool growing up.  I was a Top 40 girl…Barry Manilow and Elton John.

TBP:  How devastated are you about the “John and Kate Plus 8” marriage crumble?

Suzanne:  Naturally, I am as f**king shocked as everyone else is.  How two people can have eight babies and not be a happy Mormon is a goddamn shock to me. 

My girlfriend and I, Jennifer, watched a marathon of the show a few weeks ago.  When the camera pans to John as Kate talks about telling John she is having sextuplets, his expression is f**king priceless.  That’s the moment it all went wrong and he should have walked out then.

TBP:  Who is better matched Rosie O’Donnell and Kelly or Ellen DeGeneres and Portia?

Suzanne:  Rosie and Kelly.  They are well matched and comfortable – there’s no two people trying to be the stars, which is very difficult.

TBP:  Living in New Jersey for 10 years do the “Housewives of New Jersey” bring you fond memories?

Suzanne:  I bartended at the Houlihan’s in Secaucus.  I knew a lot of gay Italians and there is not one on that show.  How can you do a show like that in New Jersey and have nobody that’s gay?  Caroline is my favorite on the show, though. 

TBP:  If you could have only one – wealth, clout, unbelievable beauty or live to be 125 years old, which would you choose? 

Suzanne:  Clout.  Power.  No doubt. 

Tickets at AwwMama.com.